How to be supportive to a loved one suffering from anorexia
Anorexia can be difficult to understand for someone who is not suffering from it or is not a psychologist. It is taken negatively most often viewed as a lifestyle choice or a case of low esteem. You can lend a helping hand to your loved one by being supportive and understanding how you can help them in your own way.
Knowledge is power.
One of the important steps you can take is to research about anorexia. There are numerous websites offering in depth information on the mental and physical symptoms. Thoroughly understand the eating disorder including possible treatments and how you can help your loved one. Knowledge is power especially in this case.
An eating disorder goes far deeper than witnessing a person avoid food and eating it. The motivation of a person suffering from anorexia is driven by the negative feelings and mindset that convinces them to starve themselves. Eating develops into an anxiety-ridden act. It turns into their very worst fear. People suffering from anorexia thinks that a slightest bite of food will cause them to gain weight.
Why are they afraid to gain weight?
The thought of weight gain makes them feel as if they lose control and consequently are failures. Several reasons explain why the fear is so strong depending on the person. It could be a superficial reason such as the desire to be perfect. Starvation can also be a way of coping such as having control when they feel they have no control in any other part in life.
Ask them why they feel to choose to starve.
It is important to know why people suffering from anorexia opt to do this. If they say “because I want to be thin, ask them for a different reason. It is more than just the desire to be thin. It goes deeper than what meets the eye. It is highy likelythat they will either deny their eating disorder or they just don’t want to open up to you right away. All you need to do is to let them know you are their friend who is willing to listen. It will give them an outlet. It might take days, weeks, or even months before they choose to come to you and ask for help. The important thing is that you gave them an option.
Don’t make comments on your own weight issues or diet in front of them.
Consider these don’t you must not commit. It can really be tough for them to hear you say things such as not liking how you look too or counting calories out of fear of gaining weight. Don’t comment on their appearance either. You might tell them that they look fine, for them it means they look fat. You might tell them they look too thin, for them it serves as an encouragement to keep on doing what they’re doing. It is best to avoid making those comments altogether.
Give them understanding.
There are some people who dismiss anorexia as a cry for attention. The truth is that it is a very secretive disorder. They don’t want other people to know that they aren’t eating food off their plates. They tend to hide it by spreading food on their plate or cutting the food into tiny pieces. They may not be consciously asking for help but it is a subconscious cry for help. The physical evidence of weight loss is only a manifestation of the turmoil they are feeling inside. It is their message of saying “I’m lost”. These people are very fragile at this moment. You should understand them. Do not yell at them when you decide to confront them. That is the last thing they need to do. They need understanding and not discipline.
It is certainly frustrating to see someone you really care suffers from anorexia. Do not, however, make them eat by means of coercive or threatening the at the dinner table. You could end hurting them and closing yourself off to them.
Let them make a voluntary decision of entering a recovery center.
You can not force them to enter a hospital or recovery center for treatment of their problem. This could be a different story for minors or if you stand as their parent or guardian. When you threaten them with hospitalization will make them more distant from you. It could be possible that your loved one would give in to your request to seek help. Your loved one may undergo treatment and gain the needed weight just to lose it again. Not unless that person has a desire to recover from anorexia, he or she will just use the treatment to make you think that they’re doing okay and for you to leave them alone. The choice to recover from anorexia can only be made by the person himself, not you or anybody else.
It does not mean you just give up. You can tell them that recovery is worth it with facts and knowledge on how damaging anorexia does to their mind and body. AS I’ve mentioned earlier, knowledge is power. Let them know the consequences they will face in the long run if they choose to remain in the chains of anorexia. Just think of how dangerous it is when the longer a person suffers, the higher the chance he or she could die from heart failure. You don’t want to just sit there and lose your loved one out of neglect on your part.
The fact of the matter is that those suffering are not trying to need his or her life by not eating. Sad oo say, it is their way of coping and is their choice to live. It could be hard on your part on witnessing how a loved one is slowly wasting away. You must also consider how they must feel going through it. If they know and have that assurance that their family and friends are there for them, it makes their struggle a little bit easier and little less daunting.